Friday, May 13, 2016

Post 20. What to wear and how not to care.

This week I've been strutting around in various light clothing, meaning dresses, shorts and tops. Every time I put these things on, I feel two very different things. 
One, I like this and it makes me feel good.
Two, I'm too old, too pale or not thin enough for this. 

        Most of the time, I shake off the second thought and slather on the sunscreen. Later on in the day, I'm happy with my decision and actually getting a healthy glow (not tan, I'm not sure I CAN get tan. Freckles, I can do.)
        What bugs me is the fact I still have these negative thoughts about myself. I love myself and my body. I really, genuinely do. If there's a problem, I fix it with workouts, eating better and patience. 
Yet, I notice when I'm walking to somewhere, I need to push myself a bit. Remind myself I think I look good in this. No, scratch that, I. LOOK. GOOD! 

Usually, I wonder if anyone even cares what I look like. Maybe people are too busy worrying about what I think THEY look like. If this is the case, just think about the worries we have for NO reason :) 
What I'm trying to say is, we should all be able to love ourselves no matter the size. I don't judge others and I usually don't care what others think of me. Even if I do have these insecure days. I admit it and I'm okay with it. 

       Some part of this feeling might be as simple as I'm used to my jeans and t-shirts. Everyone has their comfort zone when it comes to clothing. 
Another part if the fact I often feel as if I have no fashion sense. Actually, let's amend that. I HAVE NO FASHION SENSE. I pick out what I like and I wear it. Just think of the fun those people who's job it is to get you looking fabulous would say about my colorful, mismatched closet?

I do envy people who look amazingly put together. As if they decided what to wear today last night. I want to try this but I talk myself out of this too many times because I have three children and I rarely get out of the house in the morning without a new stain from food/juice or other things. Well, like I said, if I have a problem, I will fix it. So, allow me to check Pinterest and Instagram for... 
Oh, wait... That won't help. I need to find fashion bloggers MY age :) Not because I want to dress my age but I'd like to know what they think about dressing like a 34-year-old. What is that, anyway? Dressing my age? 
Does that mean I can't wear short shorts? Or a Coachella shirt? Do I HAVE to wear a bra? Hahahahaha. Please, I think we all know if I want to wear it (or not) I will. That being said, I am going to check out a few bloggers on the subject.